Cipriani opened its doors in Monaco a few weeks ago and out of curiosity and lack of choice we went there last night. It did not disappoint; as expected we were rubbing elbows with the flash and crass crowd of Monaco. In fact we were not just rubbing elbows, we were practically sitting in each others laps. And what’s with the tiny furniture and small glasses? It was like playing make-believe in a children’s nursery.
Food and service? Starters were served in a blink of an eye – even before we were served our wine – which can only mean that the dishes were already prepared. Service was non-existent but they did present us with the bill without us asking for it so they can read minds and knew we wanted out! The cacophony was unbearable.
The cherry on the cake? The patchwork F430 seen below which was parked outside – the perfect representation of the clientele; money and no taste:
As we headed out to Yas Marina Circuit from our hotel in Abu Dhabi, braving the 40C+ heat in long sleeve t-shirt and full length trousers as instructed, we were pumped up and ready for our Aston Martin Driving Experience. However the drive out to Yas Island was a driving experience in itself as our driver’s eyes kept fluttering shut and we swerved off our lane several times. After shooting past 3 red lights we finally made it to our destination, shaken, not stirred, ready for our Aston Martins.
The safety briefing is of course a must and was actually excellent – clear, precise and easy, even for a novice like me, unlike my previous safety briefing at the Nurburgring that had me wanting to run screaming for the hills. Here I felt confident – I can do this! Yes, we can! Or rather Yas, we can!
The last words of advice given to us were “go down and choose your instructor before he chooses you” and later I was to realize just how important these words were. I was one of the first chosen in our little group, not for my charm or talent (read “lack of”) but because of my height. Philip, of similar stature, needed someone suitable (read “short” for the set up of his car and that person was me. The bonus was that his Aston, n°7, was the only car with a semblance of air conditioning – a big PLUS. AF was last man standing until the last instructor claimed him – poor thing I thought which I later realized was poor me!
I managed to climb into the car – more elegantly than when I later struggled out, drenched in sweat – and the most awkward part was the height of the dashboard, I had to sit as straight as possible, straining my neck to see past the bonnet of the car! Strapped in and ready to go, I was given the all clear to leave the pit lane and enter the track. Those poor buggers behind me!
During the briefing we were told to brake at the double cones and upon reaching the yellow cone, turn and aim for the green one. Simple. There is alot of noise in the cockpit once you get going and the helmet and balaclava don’t make hearing any easier so expect to communicate with signs; gear, faster, slower, brake etc… Well it wasn’t so bad after all and Philip and I did converse – yell – but where I expected a stream of ongoing instructions I only received indications here and there and some encouragement later to pick up speed but in the middle of that there was way too much chit-chat – where are you from, where do you live etc – chit-chat that kept breaking my concentration.
Apart from one lap of the ‘Ring, this was my first opportunity to learn a track. Of course everyone blew past me but I was happy trying to get to grips with the whole thing. This is the first real-time I have had to flap any paddles (apart from hitting the Panamera ones by accident!) and I wanted to learn how to lap this circuit properly.
It is surprising how tired you can get after 30 mins of lapping and let’s not forget the extreme heat but I loved my first taste of driving on a track. I knew I wasn’t flying but thought I was going faster than I actually was. Viewing the DVD of my Aston Martin Driving Experience – I hadn’t even noticed that there was a camera in the cockpit! – made me realize that I never even got to 100 kph! How embarrassing – Philip kept telling me I was very consistent – yes consistently slow!
My biggest deception however was watching AF’s DVD – and here comes the part of chosing your instructor well – he was accompanied by Michael, an older chap but a real instructor. Throughout you see him giving signals of the right gear to be in, slamming his hand down to break, and all other important tips to master the circuit. Obviously AF is light years ahead of me in talent and experience but I would have liked to be taken seriously too, otherwise I could have stayed in the pits and taken photos. AF even received a signed review of his performance; gears, braking, steering etc… and I got a “don’t quit your day job” handshake!
Here is an edited film of AF on the track; the full length version shows him lapping me about 15 times!! I ain’t showing my film, not this time, but would I do it again? Yas, definitely!
No I didn’t spend the weekend driving a DeLorean but experiencing some of the sights & sounds of the 8th Monaco Historic Grand Prix. It is a lot of fun and highly recommended for the true enthusiast – this is a Monaco Grand Prix without the bling and you definitely get more bang for your buck than at the upcoming Formula 1 event.
Having attended the viewing for RM Auctions we decided to go back on the Saturday afternoon to watch some of the action and action there was a plenty! The lovely little Ferrari TRC that I highlighted the other day, went for a cool €4,500,000 hammer price – a record - and had the whole room holding its collective breath in the final stages of bidding as our heads moved as one, back and worth, like at a Wimbledon final. I heard it on good authority that buyer is the owner of Victoria’s Secrets and he has been throwing quite a lot of money into this market the last couple of years. He owns a luxury yacht called “Limitless” which says it all.
The two hours that we spent watching – careful not to move lest we buy something – were entertaining and interesting, human behaviour is fun to watch; between the professional buyer and the person trying to fulfill a dream – the heart wants what the heart wants! Max Girardo – Managing Director of RM Europe and auctioneer - is exceptional and I would definitely attend again, the atmosphere is easy-going, you are surrounded by amazing cars and people who share your passion.
On to Sunday and the racing. We had the opportunity to attend in the comfort of a beautiful villa overlooking the track, avenue d’Ostende, which is the uphill stretch from St Devote towards Casino Square.
Perhaps not the greatest place to watch any real racing but good enough to experience the sights and sounds and whenever you want to understand the big picture, you step inside and check out the action on TV!
When the circuit closed at lunch time, a guard accompanied us to the premises to make sure that we didn’t go walk about on the track and were safely locked into our building for the duration of the afternoon’s events.
After watching the rear engined Grand Prix cars (1961 – 1965) we sat down to a hearty lunch in front of the TV to watch the “real” Grand Prix action in Spain. Then back to the terrace for another taste of history and a slice of cake. The race we were most looking forward to was the last one – Formula 1 (1973 – 1978) – but of course that was when the Heavens opened up. We hot footed it inside with perfect timing to watch the remaining fiasco on TV.
When the rain finally calmed down and the cars set off on their warm-up lap they could never line up on the grid properly so off for another formation lap, and another… They decided to start behind the Safety Car before everyone ended up overheating and blowing up. After some entertaining racing where many cars just went straight into St Devote, the action ended with a unceremonius pile up at Rascasse, smash, bang, boom!
We were finally released from our gilded cage and ran home. Thankfully we reached shelter before the next boom, this one coming from high above.
Last night after work we stopped by the Grimaldi Forum for the RM Auctions viewing. After spending an hour – thankfully only spending time and not money – surrounded by gorgeous classics and then finishing the evening with good friends, fine food and excellent wine, my dreams were packed with colourful scenes and here is but a sample:
And there is oh so much more! And that is without the Ducati motorcycle collection going under the hammer this afternoon which had AF salivating. I have often contemplated owning a classic but even if I did have this kind of loose change in my pocket, I would want a car to enjoy and take on the open road, not one to put on display, and I wonder whether if push came to shove, I could actually drive one anymore? No park distance control, no aircon or airbag, no power steering and where do you plug-in your ipod? I think I’ll sleep on it some more…
I was embarrassed when I took this photo in case people thought I was actually admiring the car… car? More like monstrosity. Maybe a freak wave will come and wash it away.
This coming week, coinciding with the 8th biennial Monaco Historic Grand Prix, we are blessed with not one but two auctions; Bonhams The Monaco Sale “Les Grandes Marques à Monaco” and RM Auctions Monaco Sale.
What I always love about Bonhams is that you dont have to be a multi-gazillionaire, as you browse through the catalogue you can find lots with estimates below €1,000 and you can even find memorabilia in the €100 – €200 range – so something for everyone.
I’m not particularly wild about the cars on offer, there are some greats from the past but never quite spot on for my taste, there is even a Carrera GT for AF – but in white??? Let alone overpriced and that’s just an estimate before a buyer’s premium is levied on top!
As for RM Auctions – OMG – that jumps straight in with one of the largest private collections of Ducati motorcycles ever to go on sale. Then of course I just have to fall for a 1957 Ferrari 625 TRC Spider, one of only two ever made… estimate €3,000,000 – €3,700,000… yikes!
In honour of next weekend’s Historic Monaco Grand Prix, I have changed my banner, tipping my helmet to a time gone by, when flappy paddles meant nothing at all!
Last week we received a last-minute invitation to Scuderia Monte Carlo to pass by for drinks and a sneak preview of a pre-production F12 Berlinetta. Of course we were happy to attend, it is just downstairs after all!
As we arrived the all too familiar windows of the dealership were covered with heavy velvet drapes, it felt like we were attending a meeting of a secret brotherhood and the object of worship was safely under wraps! When the elite few had all arrived, the red drape was whisked off and lo and behold – a thing of great beauty!
A work of art, beautiful flowing lines, even the interior is starting to live up to what it should be and all of this renews my faith in Ferrari, that the 458 Italia is not just a stroke of good luck.
Walking home the next day and my illusions were shattered as I was brought back to reality and face to face with a limited edition 599 GTB Fiorano celebrating 60 years of victories in Formula 1. Horrific but to be fair to the dealership, they HAD to order one.
I guess there is always a sucker out there; as they say a fool and his money are easily parted…
Top Marques has established itself quite firmly in the Monaco events calendar, coinciding with the last weekend – thursday to sunday – of the Tennis Masters tournament. It sells itself as the world’s only live supercar show which I have never really understood – live as opposed to pre-recorded? Is the Geneva motor show dead? Perhaps they are referring to the test pit outside where, once you push your way through the snap happy crowd, you can find a row of over-tuned cars ready to hit the road.
Here you will hear the cars rev up and as a policeman stops the traffic, you can watch these beasts roar as they leap forward and join the queue in the bumper to bumper traffic going round Monaco. How exciting. The pit fall of staging the event during the tennis but then without the crowds who would pay the extortionate €50 to get in? Not us locals.
As for the show itself, once you get through all the fringe exhibitions Top watch Top Boat Top Carpet Top Shop… The cars are a little… well over the top, the event being a show case for Mansory, Gemballa and co, a pimp-my-ride for the über rich if you will. So is it top marks for Top Marques? You be the judge:
“Two households, both alike in dignity, In fair Verona, where we lay our scene…”
The more literate of you will recognise the opening lines of Romeo & Juliet but imagine my surprise when we discovered that the modern-day Romeo & Juliet are very much going strong in Maranello of all places…
We were invited on a Ferrari Factory tour which I must say is a culinary experience as much as petrolhead fodder. We began with lunch at Ristorante Cavallino just opposite the old entrance to the factory. This place oozes Ferrari history even more than the museum, you almost expect to glimpse Enzo Ferrari in his private dining room. And did I mention that the pasta is divine?
After lunch we walked to the Ferrari Museum, a walk fraught with dangers because people would pop out of the bushes and whisper in heavily accented english “you wanna drive Ferrari?. In Jamaica they offer you ganja, in Maranello? A drive in an F430 – a very different kind of drug.
The museum is interesting, not as immaculate as the Porsche Museum but a must if you have the opportunity. Here our tour guides let us snap away with our cameras to our hearts content before our we were loaded onto a bus and our cameras were confiscated. The factory tour was about to begin.
And it was amongst the assembly lines, the V8s & V12s, 458s in a rainbow of colours, that we discovered our modern-day star-crossed lovers… Romeo and Julie are none other than two robots, tireless and perfectly synchronised, dipping valve seats into liquid nitrogen. They are mesmerizing and I wish I could show them to you but of course photos were out of the question.
That is the image I like to keep in mind, not the array of Ferraris displayed throughout the factory, current models and classics from days gone by, there to encourage the workers, show them what they are creating. It is supposed to instil pride in their work but sadly very few were in good condition, some scratched, some with broken suspensions, half closed bonnets… Not exactly the perfection they should be striving for…
